Life with Watanuki and Doumeki
by Allychik6
Summary: Life can get complicated when you live in a wish granting shop. And unfortunately for Watanuki, things aren't getting any simpler.
1. Third Times a Charm

Third Time's a Charm?

Watanuki blamed the whole thing entirely on Yuuko.

Doumeki chose to give her the credit.

1

It really all started because there was a ghost terrorizing couples in a park not far from _the Shop_. That was how Doumeki thought of it, as _the Shop_. Two words that inspired a myriad of thoughts that could all really be summed up in 'There was no other place like it, and maybe that was a good thing.'

Anyway, a customer had stopped by Wednesday afternoon, babbling incoherently about a bridge and a ghost and a girlfriend. For whatever reason, Doumeki had been visiting the shop that afternoon and had overheard the customer gushing on and on about it. Yuuko had explained it to him after the other guy left. Apparently, if a couple kissed on this bridge then their love would last forever. It was one of those silly superstitions that weren't really true, but people wanted to believe them anyway.

So, someone made a wish and Yuuko decided to send Watanuki to deal with the whole mess. She said something about minding the shop for other customers as her excuse for not going, and Doumeki gave her a sideways glance. Watanuki simply shouted that he didn't want to go and his soufflé would be ruined. She shrugged and sent Mokona in to watch the oven.

That's when the trouble started, because the ghost only showed itself to couples, which meant that somehow Doumeki got dragged along into it. And while Doumeki didn't mind going along, because then he got to spend more time with Watanuki, he didn't want to become Yuuko's next employee. Of course though, when he looked back on it, Doumeki was quite glad that it went. If it hadn't been for that ghost, none of the rest of it might have ever happened.

"I don't see why it had to be you." Watanuki complained loudly as they walked into the park. "Himawari-chan could have just as easily taken your spot."

Doumeki didn't bother to point out that if Watanuki even brushed against Himawari he would probably die. Watanuki just needed something to complain about. Instead he grunted something non-committal. To be honest, he had a bad feeling about this night. A ghost that only attacked couples? He wondered if anyone other than Himawari thought of them as a couple. Well, maybe Yuuko, but that wasn't exactly a comforting thought.

The park was empty, and Watanuki let out a huge sigh of relief. Less people present, less people to get hurt. "Let's get this over with." He growled and stomped over towards the bridge. Doumeki followed. He wanted to ask if Watanuki could see the ghost, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to know the answer. After all, if the ghost was already there, there would be no need to summon it. And Doumeki still hadn't decided how he felt about summoning the spirit.

Actually, he did want to summon it, but the whole thing would just end badly.

They waited for fifteen minutes, before Watanuki complained about how much work he had to do back at his apartment. "I haven't even started on the Math assignment, and then there's the bento to be made. It's already nine o'clock. Does she really expect us to wait all night for this thing to grace us with its presence?"

"We could summon it." Doumeki suggested blandly.

Watanuki shifted back and forth on his feet. Yuuko obviously hadn't let Watanuki in on the summoning secret. Doumeki almost sighed. "How do we do that?"

Doumeki closed his eyes. He had very much been hoping to avoid explaining all of this to Watanuki. The thought of the decibel at which Watanuki would yell when he found out was enough to make Doumeki want to cover his ears. "We have to act like a couple."

There was a long pause, and Watanuki could have sworn that his stomach had relocated somewhere around his knees.

"You mean, like, hold hands?" Watanuki asked in a very quiet voice. It was a tone of voice that Doumeki didn't know how to read because he wanted it to be a quiet, hopeful voice. But it was more likely to be a quiet, horrified one.

He didn't answer, which only confirmed Watanuki's fears and his stomach sank down to his feet. He continued to shift back and forth on his feet, uncertain and agitated. "Alright." Watanuki sighed loudly again. "But you better not think it means ANYthing!" He yelled. Doumeki hadn't had time to cover his ears; he was also a little shocked that Watanuki said yes.

Watanuki shuffled closer to Doumeki in an awkward sideways kind of a way. He closed his eyes and tilted his head forward. Doumeki started to lean down and then stopped. After a few moments Watanuki began to turn red; Doumeki thought it looked cute. "What are you waiting for?"

"You'll have to kiss me." Doumeki said reluctantly. Watanuki might have said that Doumeki could kiss him, but that was not the same thing as Watanuki kissing Doumeki. Not the same thing at all. "The ghost is going to appear behind whoever starts the kiss, and I have to be able to shoot it." He calmly looked away and began to string his bow, giving Watanuki time to make up his mind.

At any other time, Doumeki would have admitted the truth to himself, because he was one of those people who would rather know the truth than not. But when it came to protecting Watanuki, everything took a back seat.

But if he wanted to be honest with himself, he wanted to lean down and kiss Watanuki. Not to make the spirit appear, not because it was part of the mission, not even because it would help Watanuki, but because he wanted to see if Watanuki would look that cute with his lips swollen and red from being kissed, from being sucked on and nipped at. He wanted to know if Watanuki would moan and sigh, or if he would be quiet. That was if he was being honest with himself.

Doumeki waited. He could afford to be patient.

"Fine." Watanuki ground out. "But don't think this is ever going to happen again! AND we are not telling anyone, EVER! I love Himawari-chan!" He announced loudly, as if to everyone who might happen to wonder. He stepped up in front of Doumeki, almost touching but not quite. It was like one of those moments in the movies, where the hero and the heroine are standing so close they could feel the breath of the other one, their chests almost brushing from the proximity. Doumeki drew his bow, just to be prepared. Watanuki hastily pressed his lips to Doumeki's. It wasn't a kiss; it wasn't even a pretend kiss. He just smashed his face against Doumeki's and held his lips perfectly still for a moment.

There was no way anyone would ever mistake that for a real kiss. Doumeki pulled away just a fraction and gently brushed his lower lip against Watanuki's. That wasn't a kiss either, but it was meant to give Watanuki a clue about what to do. Which, thankfully, Watanuki got. Whether he figured it out consciously and then brushed both of his lips across Doumeki's mouth or whether it was just a physical reaction didn't matter. That was a real kiss. Gentle, affectionate, and just a little bit afraid. Doumeki thought it must be what heaven was like, at least without the danger to Watanuki forming just behind the other boy.

Watanuki had closed his eyes when he leaned in the kiss Doumeki. He noticed the change in posture as Doumeki drew back the string and he felt the arrow fly past over his shoulder. But mostly he was aware of how Doumeki's lips were still pressed firmly against his own, and how those same lips were really, very soft and pliable against his own. He didn't notice that the spirit was gone, but rather that Doumeki had sighed ever so slightly. Just the tiniest puff of air against his own lips before Doumeki pulled away from the kiss.

"I want prawns in my bento tomorrow."

2

The second time, Yuuko had asked Watanuki to go retrieve a mirror from an old house as payment from some Yokai, and out of habit, Watanuki had asked Doumeki to come with him. It was a creepy old house, and Yuuko had warned him that the Yokai who lived there didn't take kindly to strangers. What Yuuko hadn't told either Doumeki or Watanuki was that the old demon didn't like anything except his wife who had died fifty years ago, and that the mirror was the only thing he had left of her.

It had been several weeks since the first incident, (Doumeki really couldn't think of it as anything else) long enough for Watanuki to get over his weirdness, but not for Doumeki. He could still remember the exact way Watanuki had pressed his lips against him. It was a special kind of torture. The only thing that Doumeki had going for him was that Watanuki didn't seem to notice when Doumeki's control slipped a little.

Like it had today, on the walk over to the mansion. Watanuki had been stomping ahead of Doumeki, which meant that Doumeki had a very good view of Watanuki's ass. Doumeki hadn't realized just how appealing it could be; most of the time he was focused on the other boy's hands. And Watanuki had nice hands. Long thin fingers, perfect for wielding utensils in the kitchen or pushing a needle through fabric. Nimble neat hands, clever hands. Doumeki sometimes wondered just how good Watanuki was with them.

Those thoughts occupied him all the way up the front steps. Watanuki had already gone in and was then running out the door. Doumeki wasn't entirely sure what Watanuki did because he simply grabbed Doumeki's hand as he sped by, the demon not far behind. It was really unfortunate that spirits were attracted to Watanuki, because that made it very easy for this one to follow them.

And Doumeki had left his bow at home.

But there was one other talent that Doumeki had, other than his ability to exorcise spirits. They had no interest in him, unlike Watanuki. Doumeki started to run harder, trying to get a little distance on the spirit, looking for a place to hide. Watanuki sputtered some unintelligible sentence that was surely a protest but then picked up his pace. They came into a part of the neighborhood that Doumeki was familiar with, it had several little hidey-holes where they might be able to hide from the ghost. Just a little farther up the road Doumeki spotted one; he stopped dead and yanked hard on Watanuki's hand. Watanuki spun in front of Doumeki, and Doumeki pinned him to the wall of the alcove.

He let go of Watanuki's hand and placed both of his hands on either side of Watanuki's head. They were very close together. "What are you doing?!" Watanuki yelled and brought his hands up to push against Doumeki's chest. Doumeki pushed his body closer to Watanuki. "Get away from me! What are you some kind of pervert? Back up! I can't breathe with you this close!"

There really wasn't a choice, at least not one that Doumeki could see. His yelling would either bring the ghost down on the both of them or cause him to go deaf. And if Doumeki moved his hand to silence Watanuki, there was a good chance he would end up getting bitten. So he did the only other thing he knew might work. He leaned down and kissed Watanuki.

He'd meant to simply emulate their last kiss, something chaste and uncomplicated, something that might be less awkward for Watanuki. But Watanuki was squirming and trying to protest vocally, and they were so very close together. It was a matter of life and death. At least, that's what Doumeki told himself. It was a matter of Watanuki's life or death, and Doumeki had very definite opinions about that.

So he nibbled gently on Watanuki's lower lip. He teased and pulled and waited until Watanuki actually opened his mouth without a sound. Doumeki pressed his advantage, moving his tongue into Watanuki's mouth, and hoping that Watanuki didn't decide to bite it.

He didn't. In fact, he touched it with his tongue. And then Doumeki was sucking and nibbling, and subtly pushing himself more fully against Watanuki. Watanuki wasn't the loud type. He didn't moan or sigh, and at first Doumeki was a little disappointed. He had wanted to hear what kinds of noise Watanuki would make. But then he felt Watanuki's hands grab the front of his shirt and pull hard. His thighs were pressed as tight as possibly against Doumeki, and it wouldn't be long before his was squirming. Watanuki was possessed, and possessive, which only fueled Doumeki.

It was Watanuki who put an end to the make-out session. Abruptly. He shook his head and slipped under Doumeki's arms. He looked at Doumeki, one long, piercing and unreadable look. Watanuki ran. And Doumeki watched, unsure and somewhat hating himself.

3

Yuuko was gone, just disappeared one day, and Doumeki really wasn't sure what to do with himself. Well, that wasn't exactly true; Doumeki wasn't sure what to do with Watanuki. He wasn't even sure if he should do something. And so he was sitting there, absently staring out at nothing and thinking. Well, he was trying not to think at all, but that was something that Doumeki wasn't terribly good at, especially when Watanuki looked that way. And he looked that way because of Yuuko.

On the one hand, Yuuko had a tendency to creep him out just a little with inexplicable warnings and her strange demands. She had those sly looks for no apparent reason, and that way of poking and prodding with words and fingers. But she clearly cared for Watanuki, it showed in all of those warnings and prods. And that alone endeared her to Doumeki. It was also nice that so many of her demands meant that Doumeki got to spend time with Watanuki.

But she just disappeared, leaving Watanuki clueless and confused. It was why Doumeki was currently sitting on the porch of the Shop, a bottle of sake open but untouched next to him. He was thinking about how to take care of Watanuki now. The idiotic boy was now trying to grant wishes, trying to fill shoes that were, well, Doumeki wouldn't say they were too big, but definitely pointy and almost impossible to put on. In fact, he wasn't even sure Yuuko could fit into them.

Although, it might have been nice to see if Watanuki could actually wear a pair of Yuuko's shoes, those pointy pumps, thigh high boots, skimpy little slippers. Doumeki wondered if Watanuki would be able to put them on, if he might be able to walk in them, or if he might fall down…if he might need Doumeki's help in standing back up. It was a lovely image really.

Watanuki came out onto the porch with another bottle of sake and some little appetizers on a tray. For a moment Doumeki was caught between reality and the fantasy. It was disconcerting. Watanuki swayed slightly as he put the trey down next to Doumeki and then left without saying anything. It took Doumeki a moment to recognize the scent on Watanuki. Alcohol. For possibly the first time ever, Watanuki had been drinking, drinking enough to smell like alcohol.

He stood up awkwardly and followed Watanuki to the kitchen. It smelled like food and alcohol, although mostly food. When he looked in, he saw more food than Doumeki felt either of them could actually consume. Which meant that Watanuki was still cooking for Yuuko. And possibly drinking for her. Although, Doumeki thought there might be more food then even she could eat.

"What are you doing?"

Watanuki didn't move from his spot at the counter. Doumeki didn't think he even blinked at the question. "I'm cooking. When Yuuko gets back she's going to be very hungry, so I thought I would get a head start making all of her favorites." He took a drink from the bottle of plum wine at his elbow.

"Did you buy enough alcohol for her too?" Doumeki had meant the question to be slightly ironic and thus piss off Watanuki. He wanted to get a reaction.

"Yes I did!" He shouted, grabbed the bottle and stormed past Doumeki into the hallway.

That was not what he had been expecting. That was not a very Watanuki like answer, and Doumeki was worried. He followed Watanuki down the hall down to his bedroom. The door was still open from when Watanuki had slammed it against the wall.

"Watanuki." Doumeki said from the doorway. He didn't dare step over the threshold, that acted seemed a little too intimate.

"Go away."

"No."

Watanuki stood up drunkenly from his bed and walked over to Doumeki. They each stood on one side of the door, as if that was the last barrier between them and some unavoidable end. "I said 'Go AWAY!'" He tried to shut the door in Doumeki's face.

But Doumeki grabbed onto it and forced it to stay open. He leaned over and said very definitely in Watanuki's face, "No." This seemed to be the most important thing that Doumeki had ever said up until that point.

"FINE!" Watanuki spat in his face and stumbled back across the room. "It's not like you're going to be here long anyway."

"I'm not going anywhere."

Watanuki laughed humorlessly as he turned around. "Everyone leaves. The only person who stays is Himawari-chan, and I can't touch her." He grabbed the bottle and took a gulp. "So, just go." He drained the bottle and dropped it on the floor. Doumeki watched as it rolled back and forth across the floor until it finally stopped, at the foot of Watanuki's bed.

"I'm not going anywhere." Doumeki stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. It was a simple gesture, but he hadn't been invited and so Doumeki felt as though he were invading.

"Is there something about the word 'Everyone' you don't understand?" He stalked drunkenly towards Doumeki. "Because in case you didn't notice, my parents died, Himawari and I can never touch, and now Yuuko is gone. You are the only one left. So just leave." Watanuki peered up at his face. "I'd rather get it all done and over with if you don't mind." He started to walk away.

Doumeki reached out and grabbed a hold of his arm. "No." Doumeki's breath brushed against Watanuki's face. It was another invasion, this time of Watanuki's personal space.

"No, I don't want it over and done with?" Watanuki asked, his eyes searching Doumeki's. They were intense and staring straight at Watanuki's eyes. Surely he was looking for answers in that stare, but Doumeki didn't have any answers.

Watanuki suddenly reached up and kissed Doumeki. He was fierce and lonely and desperate. And Doumeki was patient and content and gentle. They both needed someone, someone to hold onto, someone to ground them in reality, someone who would be there when the pieces needed to be picked up. But all Watanuki knew was that the pain was less when he was pressed up against Doumeki, and all Doumeki understood was that Watanuki needed him.

Suddenly, Watanuki's lips were less insistent, his breath came in great gasps, and his hands were clenched on Doumeki's shirt. He wasn't sure what to do now; that was the end of his experience and theoretical knowledge. He wasn't even sure where this was going, except that it was going somewhere, and he didn't want it to stop. But Doumeki knew. He reached his hands up between them, they were shaking, and began to unbutton Watanuki's shirt. He ran those same hands lightly across that pale skin, up and down, side to side. When one of his fingers passed over a nipple, Watanuki shivered in pleasure and broke off the kiss. He looked up at Doumeki who gave a soft smile and kissed his forehead.

Watanuki gasped as Doumeki's hand teased that nipple back and forth. "Please." He whispered, unsure of what he wanted but knowing that Doumeki would take care of it. Doumeki was always there, always looking after Watanuki, and Watanuki instinctively reached for Doumeki.

Doumeki slid his other hand down over the bulge in Watanuki's pants. It was hot and hard, and Doumeki was oddly pleased by it. He gentle caressed it until Watanuki was rocking back and forth in time with Doumeki's hand. Watanuki moaned loudly, in Doumeki's ear, but Doumeki didn't mind. It was a new kind of noise to emerge from Watanuki, and it didn't grate on his hearing. He moved his hand, intending to remove Watanuki's pants, but Watanuki objected in a wordless plea and pressed his cock more firmly against Doumeki's hand.

It didn't take long. Doumeki hadn't realized just how inexperienced Watanuki was, didn't know that he was so close to the edge. When he came, Watanuki was crying and clinging to Doumeki as if he were the only thing keeping him from shattering into tiny little pieces. Doumeki held him carefully, as if the wrong move would shatter Watanuki. After a while, Watanuki stopped gasping for breath, stopped shaking, but he didn't let go of Doumeki's shirt. He started crying, the soft tears that didn't make a single noise.

Doumeki helped Watanuki into his pajamas and under the blankets. Watanuki had slowly stopped crying, but he hadn't really let go of Doumeki. Gently, Doumeki pulled at his hand, trying to release Watanuki's fingers.

"You're going to leave me now, aren't you?" Watanuki said in a sleepy, slurred voice with his eyes half open. "I knew you would."

"I'm not going anywhere." Doumeki said softly. "I just don't want to sleep in this shirt and get it all wrinkled." He smiled at the sleepy, confused look on Watanuki's face.

"Oh." Watanuki let go, and a few moments later felt Doumeki slide in next to him on the bed. "Did you fold it? Because otherwise I'll have to iron it anyway." He felt Doumeki smile as he placed a kiss on Watanuki's forehead.

"What are you making for breakfast?" Doumeki asked.

"As if ironing your shirt isn't enough?" Watanuki snuggled into Doumeki's chest and fell asleep.


	2. Up Close and Personal

Up Close and Personal

When Watanuki woke up, he froze. Several things went through his mind all at once. One, he was curled up next to a very warm and very comfortable Doumeki, which meant that last night had actually happened. Which meant that he had in fact had sex with Doumeki. Drunken sex, but sex nonetheless. And he didn't know what to think about that. Or do. Or pretty much anything, which is why he froze. He curled into himself, away from Doumeki, hiding under the blankets.

Doumeki noticed that Watanuki had gone stiff in his arms. He slowly disentangled himself from the other boy and picked up his shirt. Watanuki remembered something about ironing and breakfast, but he couldn't make himself face Doumeki.

Without saying a word, Doumeki put on his shirt and walked out of the room. Watanuki still couldn't find the courage to get out of bed. He must have lain there for over half an hour, confused and unable to dispel that confusion. Eventually he forced himself to leave the room, thinking that perhaps if he left he might find something to distract himself. Perhaps food would help him to settle his mind.

The kitchen was a disaster. Before Watanuki could even think about cooking something, he had to clean up the giant mess he had left the night before. Half cooked dishes and an open bottle of champagne littered the counter top. The stove was covered with stains and spills from whatever he had been cooking, and the table was covered with food that was slowly going bad. It was going to be a long morning.

Watanuki put on an apron and grabbed a pair of rubber gloves. He ran hot water in the sink and began to throw out the bad food, one dish at a time. Yuuko loved salmon and the dry white wine he had picked to go with it. Then there were those dumplings with the sweet wine. She had asked for those only two weeks ago. Curry, stew, French dishes, fruit tarts and chocolate cake. Carefully sliced vegetables arranged artfully on a platter. The fruit salad. All of it dishes she had eaten and loved, all of it had to be thrown out.

Eventually Watanuki sat down on the floor and cried.

That's how Himawari found him, in the midst of a half-way clean kitchen, on the floor, sobbing pathetically. "Oh, Watanuki." She didn't say anything else. After all, in the face of grief words don't help very much.

He opened his eyes and then wiped the tears away. "I don't know why I'm crying. She's going to come back. Isn't that what reincarnation means?"

"She'll be back." Himawari agreed.

"And I will be here, waiting for her." He stood up on shaky legs. "I'm still going to grant her wish."

She nodded. "Can I help you clean up the kitchen?"

Things went back to normal after that, at least as normal as things had ever been. Watanuki made lunch every day. He went to school. But he didn't talk to Doumeki. And he lost weight. Doumeki wanted to say something about it. He wanted to ask Watanuki if he was eating any meal other than lunch, but he was afraid. He didn't want to startle Watanuki again. He didn't want to scare him away from school, because if Watanuki didn't come to school then he might not eat at all.

So he said nothing. He pretended he saw nothing.

Until Himawari-chan said something. She put down her chopsticks and looked very serious. "Watanuki, you should eat more." She said. "If you lose any more weight, your pants are not going to fit any more."

Doumeki looked. It was true. If Watanuki were to stand up, they would slide down a good three inches. And then Doumeki realized that he hadn't been paying enough attention. He should have noticed that Watanuki was holding his pants up as he walked. He should have realized that Watanuki only ate half of the bento he brought to school. He should have seen a lot of things.

Watanuki looked down at his lap. He didn't want to say anything, but he had to. "I'm sorry for worrying you Himawari-chan." He picked up the bento and smiled.

She smiled back at him, even though she could see through the falsity of the smile. "I have to go." She said with a sigh. "I need to talk to a teacher about a make-up test. I hate missing school." She smiled again at both Doumeki and Watanuki. "See you guys later."

Watanuki gave her that same fake smile. It was hard for him to find anything to smile about anymore. He had promised Yuuko that he would go on existing, and that was something he intended to do. But right now, that existence didn't amount to much. Yuuko probably wouldn't like that, but it was the best that he could manage right now.

It was the smile that did Doumeki in. He wanted to reach out and slap Watanuki so much that his hand stung. "Don't smile like that."

Watanuki dropped the smile and looked at Doumeki as he took another bite of the bento. Everyday Doumeki sat there and ate Watanuki's food. Every day, without regard to the fact that Yuuko would never again eat the things that Watanuki prepared. Anger came out of nowhere. He reached out his hand and slapped Doumeki with everything in him.

All the blood drained out of Doumeki's cheek and then rushed back in making the shade of red all the more violent. Watanuki stared at the red, the blood red color. Doumeki touched the red mark and winced. It was certainly going to leave a nasty bruise.

"Don't smile when you're sad. Not in front of me." He said, not a trace of anger in his voice.

Watanuki suddenly felt ashamed. "I'm sorry."

Doumeki looked at Watanuki, at his face and arms, at his stomach and legs. They were far too skinny. "It's alright." Doumeki said.

Watanuki looked at his hand and then up at Doumeki's face. He started to reach out, to touch Doumeki. But then he panicked and ran.

That night, Doumeki stopped at a convenience store and bought a bento. The cashier stared at the bruise on his face as he paid for the food. He picked the bento that looked the best; it had prawns in it. He had told his parents that he was studying at a friend's house and that he might be home late. They had looked at him knowingly, as if they knew it was a lie and they understood how important it was for him to tell it.

Doumeki had been lying a lot lately, to himself and to everyone else, and it had taken lunch today to make him realize that. He wanted to believe that Watanuki was okay. He wanted to think that he wasn't needed because he was afraid of being rejected by him again. But Watanuki needed something, and Doumeki wanted to provide that something.

He stood in front of the shop for a long time, until Watanuki actually came outside and looked at him. They both stared at each other for a long while. Doumeki noticed that Watanuki was in the middle of cleaning something. It was probably the only thing that kept him from completely falling apart.

Watanuki looked at Doumeki and saw something he hadn't seen before. He saw a man, lost and confused and desperately lonely. For the first time, Watanuki looked at Doumeki and wondered why Doumeki kept coming back, after the yelling and the silent treatment, after that night over three weeks ago, after the way Watanuki had treated him the morning after. "Will you come inside?"

Doumeki walked into the shop, clutching the bag in his hand tightly. "I brought dinner."

Watanuki took the bento from Doumeki. He noticed that it was store bought, something that Doumeki hated. He noticed that it was expensive, and he realized that Doumeki had done this for him. He smiled at the prawns. "Thank you."

He moved around the kitchen, getting out plates and bowls. "I don't have anything to go with it."

"That's alright." Doumeki sat down at the table. He looked around the kitchen. It was utterly pristine, so different from the last time he had been in here. Somehow, the cleanliness made him feel a little better.

"I've been cleaning the whole store." Watanuki said as he divided the bento onto two plates. "Her treasure room is an utter disaster. It will probably take me weeks to get it into some kind of order."

"Ah." Doumeki took a bite.

Watanuki took one too. "It's kind of nice, to see all of the things she collected, the things she thought were important. It's a bit like she's still here."

"Hm."

They were both quiet as they ate. Watanuki was looking at Doumeki, really looking. Doumeki had lost weight too, and he still had that lonely look in his eyes. "Doumeki." He called. But Doumeki was lost in his thoughts. He was thinking about Yuuko, about all the things she did, how she changed Watanuki, how he was grateful to her. "Doumeki." He still didn't look up, and Watanuki thought he might start to cry again. Not because Doumeki wasn't answering, but because he was lonely. Because he wanted to feel connected to someone. Because the last time he hadn't felt lonely was over three weeks ago.

"Shizuka."

Doumeki's eyes zeroed in on Watanuki like a drowning man looking at a piece of driftwood.

"Shizuka." The name rolled off of Watanuki's tongue, and it actually made him feel better. If he had any desire to be honest with himself, which most of the time Watanuki wasn't, the word always made him feel a little better.

Doumeki was confused. Very, very confused. He had never expected to hear that come out of Watanuki's mouth, not even in those fevered dreams he had sometimes in the middle of the night. It was extremely intimate to hear his name come out of Watanuki's mouth.

"Shizuka." Watanuki said it again. He moved over to Doumeki and laid his head on Doumeki's shoulder. "I'm glad you're here."

"Me too." Doumeki put his hand over Watanuki's. "Kimihiro."


	3. The Five Week Mark

_Author's Note: __So, since I had such an overwhelming number of reviews and story alerts, I thought it might be a good idea to sort of explain this story to you guys. First of all, there will be more chapters. But, there is no over arching plot line. This story began because I wrote the first chapter as a short story, and at the end of it went 'But Watanuki and Doumeki aren't in a relationship yet! I can't end it here!' So, the second chapter was born. At the end of which I went, 'But I made this story rated M for yaoi goodness, there isn't that much yaoi goodness yet. I can't end it here!' Which just goes to show that I have to have more chapters, each one begetting a new one. It's a vicious cycle. What it means though is that each chapter is meant to be more like a short story, a little look in Watanuki and Doumeki's life after Yuuko dies. Oh yeah, I should probably mention that if you are reading the English translation, Warning! Here there be spoilers._

**The Five Week Mark**

Pat, pat, pat. It was Doumeki walking down the hallway to the kitchen, trying to make his heavy footfalls quieter. Not that it would matter if Watanuki was asleep. He could sleep through just about anything, except his alarm clock. Speaking of which, Watanuki rolled over and looked at the red numbers: it read 4:17 am. He sat up and thought about turning on the light, since he wasn't sleeping anyway. He stared at the light coming from underneath the door and listened to the water run in the kitchen. If he turned on the light, Doumeki would likely knock to see if everything was alright.

Which was a ridiculous question. If everything were all right, neither of them would be awake at 4:18 in the morning. Of course, Watanuki thought to himself, it was better with Doumeki staying in the Shop with him. He didn't feel nearly so lonely. But there was still that little bit of him that was uncertain. Uncertain about a lot of things, and that was why he didn't sleep well at night.

It might have been better if Watanuki had turned the light on, and Doumeki had stopped by. They might have talked, might have been able to settle some of those roaming thoughts. And as Watanuki stared at the door, he seriously considered it. But he was afraid.

Mokona rolled over on the pillow next to Watanuki. He smiled and pulled the blanket more firmly over the little plushie creature. The familiar pat-pat came back down the hallway and paused outside Watanuki's door. He held his breath. When the steps continued he exhaled sharply.

But Watanuki did not fall back asleep. He stayed up, wondering what kept Doumeki up at night, what made him wander the Shop in the small hours of the morning.

* * *

Beep, beep, beep. Doumeki slammed his hand down on the top of his alarm clock with a loud smack. It was six am, and he had slept maybe a total of four hours last night, again. It wasn't so much that he lay awake in bed for hours, but that he would sleep and then wake up, fall back asleep just to wake up again. Eventually he would get up and get a drink of water. That sometimes helped him to settle his mind a little and then go back to sleep. It hadn't helped last night.

He shook off the blankets and stamped over to his closet. It took a few minutes for him to yank on his clothes. He put his shirt on backwards, which did not help his mood. He yanked it back off again and then shoved his arms into the sleeves.

He tore the seam in his left armpit.

Doumeki bit his lip hard to keep from shouting and waking up Watanuki. He couldn't sew up the seam himself, that would probably just end with blood on the shirt as well as a ripped seam. And he wouldn't wake up Watanuki. Maybe Himawari would be able to help him, if he got to school early enough. He dashed into the bathroom to finish getting ready to go and was out the door just after 6:30.

He had to stop by the shrine before school; the courtyard was a little dirty and he didn't want his parents to think he was slacking on his work. If he hurried, he'd be able to sweep the whole thing and catch Himawari before school started and still avoid a lecture from his mother about not being home very much the last week and a half.

No such luck. She was standing by the front door, broom in hand. "Welcome home, Shizuka."

"Good morning, mother. I thought I'd tidy up the courtyard before school today." He tried to appease her before even coming into the shrine.

She tapped her toe on the wooden porch and tapped her fingers against the broom handle. A very bad sign. "You've been very busy this past week. Too busy to come home to sleep."

He walked a little closer, stalling to try and find a good excuse. Not that there was an excuse that his parents would understand. "I've been trying to help a friend." He approached the porch. "He had a close friend die recently."

Her hard expression softened a little. "That's terrible. Will you be coming home for dinner tonight?"

Doumeki let out an almost silent sigh. He didn't want to leave Watanuki alone. Last time he had spent the night at the Shrine, Watanuki had forgotten to eat dinner, again. But then his mother was looking at him like hell would freeze over before she would accept a no from him. "Can Watanuki come?"

"Of course." She exhaled loudly and smiled. "It is a lovely day today. Dinner will be at six." She turned to go back into the house. "Don't be late."

"I wouldn't dream of it." Doumeki said to himself sarcastically. And then he realized that his mother had taken the broom into the Shrine with her. If he wanted to sweep, then he would have to go in after her. Angrily, he shoved his sleeve up his arm to look at his watch, 7 am. He had an hour before class started. If he left now, he would be half an hour early, bored and worried, or he could follow his mother into the house.

He stomped up the porch.

She looked particularly pleased with herself when he walked into the kitchen. "May I have the broom, please?"

"Sit down and have breakfast." She gestured to the table. "I'm making omelets today."

Doumeki's stomach growled, and even though he hadn't wanted to eat with his mother, he sat down at the table.

She cracked an egg on the edge of the skillet. "So, tell me about this friend you've been looking after."

And this was exactly why Doumeki hadn't wanted to eat. He didn't want the twenty questions to which he didn't know the answers. He didn't want to subject Watanuki to her demanding personality. But mothers are a whole other species not meant to be messed with. "His name is Watanuki. We are in the same class."

"Is this that same boy that you've been helping with exorcisms?"

Leave it to his father to share everything Doumeki did with his mother. "Yes."

"He must be a very troublesome friend."

She said it innocently enough, but Doumeki heard the underlying tone, the tone that said 'so this is the boy who has been causing my precious little baby boy so much trouble, taking his attention away from school and his duties at the shrine.' And Doumeki had no defense to that.

"I'll be very glad to meet him at dinner tonight." She handed Doumeki a cheese omelet, and Doumeki felt his stomach in his throat.

* * *

Watanuki decided to take Mokona to the grocery store to buy something for Doumeki's bento for tomorrow. It was a nice day, and he felt like getting out of the house for a little while. "Mokona? Are you ready to go?"

"Yes! Can I put up the sign?"

Doumeki had made Watanuki a sign for when he left the shop to do errands, just a simple little thing that said 'Out of _the Shop_, will be back soon.' Just having the sign made Watanuki feel like he really was running a wish granting shop, even though he wasn't very good at it yet.

"Sure." Watanuki smiled at Mokona and then helped him to his perch on Watanuki's shoulder. "Ready?"

"Yep!"

A trip to the store with Watanuki always meant looking for the best and freshest ingredients. Since he wasn't going to school and he didn't really need to worry about money as the Shop always provided him with exactly what he needed, Watanuki could afford to be very picky. Mokona was often very good at finding the best fruit, and it was good for Mokona to get out of the shop too. And, truth be told, Watanuki liked the company.

"Ooh! I found a good one, Watanuki!" Mokona called and pointed to a very nice looking squash.

"Thank you." But as Watanuki went to grab the vegetable, another hand reached in and took it. She bumped into Watanuki

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry!" She said.

"That's alright." Watanuki said, and then he looked at her. There was something very familiar about her, but he would have sworn that he had never met her. After all, it wasn't terribly often that he met middle aged women, excepting the Shop of course. "I'm sorry, but have we met before?"

She smiled. "I don't think so, but I do have a son about your age, so it's possible."

"Huh." Watanuki said, but the answer didn't satisfy his curiosity.

"I'm making dinner for him tonight, and a friend of his." A dark look crossed her face. "He hasn't been home all week, so I want it to be very good." And then she smiled again. "Anyway, I'm terribly sorry for bumping you."

"It's quite all right." Watanuki said, the incident already forgotten.

* * *

Doumeki was seriously wondering just how his day could get worse. There had been a pop quiz in English that he hadn't studied for last night, half of his math problems had been wrong, and Himawari hadn't been able to fix his shirt; it had been a terrible day. And he hadn't asked Watanuki if he would come to dinner tonight. And he just wanted to go to sleep. Oh, and his bow string had snapped at practice.

He stood in front of the Shop and could not make himself take another step. It was as if everything suddenly hit him. It had been five weeks since Yuuko had gone, and things were not getting better. Oh sure, Watanuki could sometimes fend for himself, but some days he didn't even get out of bed. The school work piled up, and his parents nagged, and for the life of him Doumeki just wanted Yuuko back. Was that so much to ask for really?

Watanuki was sweeping the front porch when he saw Doumeki come up to the gate. He watched as Doumeki stopped, and he saw the pain there. But he didn't understand it. "Are you coming in?"

Doumeki snapped out of his daze and walked purposefully through the gate. "Would you eat dinner at my house tonight?" That wasn't what Doumeki had meant to say, he had meant to ask if Watanuki would like to eat dinner, but sometimes things just don't come out right.

"Okay." Watanuki didn't know why he said yes, but he was having a good day and it seemed like a good idea.

"We should probably head over there."

"Okay." Watanuki propped his broom up just inside the door. "Do you want to change first?"

Doumeki looked down at his left shoulder, thinking about the tear there. "Yes." He walked into the house, passed Watanuki.

There was definitely something wrong with Doumeki, Watanuki realized as their shoulders brushed. Something very wrong, but he had no idea what it might be. Doumeki hadn't said anything to make Watanuki think there was anything wrong, except that today his head seemed to droop.

"Are you okay?" Watanuki asked when he came back to the front door.

"Tired is all." Doumeki grunted and moved out the door.

They walked to the shrine in awkward silence. Well, Watanuki thought it was awkward; Doumeki didn't notice. It was just before six when they arrived. Watanuki had been watching Doumeki's back through the whole walk, trying to decide exactly what it was that was so off about Doumeki. Just before they walked through the front door, it hit Watanuki, why the woman in the store had looked familiar. She had resembled Doumeki.

And then she stepped out of the kitchen. "Shizuka, I'm so glad you made it." She kissed him on the cheek. "And this is your friend?" Their eyes meet over his shoulder, and hers narrowed.

Watanuki quickly bowed. "It's very nice to meet you ma'am."

"Yes." She said slowly. "Well, why don't we sit down and eat?" She pulled Doumeki over to the chair next to her, leaving Watanuki on the other side of the table by himself. "I'm sorry that my husband couldn't be here. He had to be across town for a meeting this evening."

"I would have liked to have met him too."

"Yes, I'm sure." She gave that sickly sweet smile again, and Watanuki suddenly felt as if he were meeting the parents of a girlfriend. She distinctly seemed to not like him, and he desperately wanted to impress her.

Doumeki wanted to kill his mother, say something to get her to stop, anything. But there would be no stopping her, so instead he just ground his teeth together until his jaw hurt.

"My son says that you recently lost a friend. That's terrible to hear."

"Yes, she was—very important to me." Watanuki said slowly. "Doumeki has been very kind to take so much care of me."

"Yes, but don't you have parents or a guidance counselor to help you?" She asked. "Don't misunderstand, I am very sorry for you loss, but Doumeki's grades have been suffering, and I haven't seen him in over a week."

Watanuki swallowed hard. "I am very sorry to have inconvenienced you so much. I didn't know."

"It's fine." Doumeki growled out and glared at his mother. "It's not a problem at all."

"I just worry about my little boy finding a good job." She smiled and it was like acid to Watanuki. "You have no idea how hard he's worked to get where he is. I would hate to see him throw all of that away over—"

"ENOUGH!" Doumeki shouted. "Enough." He stared at his mother. "I have chosen to help Watanuki. He is important to me, and I will not listen to you blame him for everything that has gone wrong recently. You have no idea what his life is like. Yuuko was like family. The only family he had. And I need to help him!"

It was an outburst worthy of Watanuki, and his mother was stunned. She had never seen Doumeki shout, and certainly never at her. Watanuki was in shock. He had no idea that Doumeki had that much stress in his life. And as Doumeki walked out of the kitchen without another word, his mind zeroed in on the words, 'He is important to me.'

"I'm terribly sorry that I have caused you so many problems." Watanuki said quickly and ran out the door after Doumeki.

He was sitting behind a tree, having finally lost the will to keep standing.

"I'm sorry." Watanuki said quietly and awkwardly. He wasn't sure what to do.

"I just keep thinking that there was something I could have done, some way I could have prevented it all. And then it wouldn't be like this."

Watanuki sat down next to him. "Prevented what?"

Doumeki looked at him. "Her death, your pain. I should have—" He broke down in sobs, the great heaving kind.

Watanuki wrapped his hands around Doumeki and pulled him in close. It was awkward to sit on the ground turned towards Doumeki and holding him, but it was too important. "You couldn't have stopped it. There was nothing you could do."

"Yes there is. I could have stopped it." Doumeki jerked back. "I swore I wouldn't let anything hurt you. I could have stopped it."

"No." Watanuki repeated, his lower lip quivering. "Neither of us could have done anything. She was gone before we ever met her." He was crying too, but the quiet kind that stops easily. Watanuki had cried before. Doumeki was purging his grief, getting it all out and in the open. They stayed that way for a while, until the tears had all dried and Doumeki's eyes weren't red anymore.

"It's not fair. It was such a short time."

"It was a long time," Watanuki said. "And she was ready for it." He leaned his head against Doumeki's. "Did you— Nevermind."

"What?" Doumeki looked over, his face very close to Watanuki's.

Watanuki looked at him, and he realized that he wanted to kiss Doumeki. Not because he was lonely, not because Doumeki needed it, not because of some outside circumstances. But because he actually wanted to kiss Doumeki. He put his hand on Doumeki's cheek and very slowly leaned towards Doumeki until the lips touched. It was brief and chaste, but it was nice.

Doumeki was surprised. He shouldn't have been. After all, Watanuki had moved slowly, put his hand on his face, all the signs were there, but he was still surprised. When it sunk in, he said, "That was nice."

Watanuki blushed. "Do you think, maybe we could, umm, do it again?"

Doumeki smiled and started to lean in.

"Not now! Your mother's watching." He pouted a little and nodded towards the house.

Doumeki sighed. "Maybe later? Back at the Shop."

"Back at the Shop." Watanuki agreed.

_Second Author's Note: Just so that everyone is aware, the next chapter is going to be lemon-y goodness. I had thought about adding it one to the end of this chapter, but I really want it to be good and lemony. And this chapter kind of emphasises the two of them dealing with their grief. So, if you do not like lemon (why are you reading this story? Wasn't the first chapter enough of a hint?) don't read the next chapter at all. If you do like lemon, the next chapter will be Nice!_


	4. Seduction

_So, I meant to update more quickly than this. (For those of you who have been reading since I posted the first chapter, you'll remember that you got two straight off the bat, and the third one came up soon after), but oddly enough when one goes on a week long bike trip and then has a boyfriend come to visit one loses track of the whole fanfiction thing for a little bit..._

_Just so everyone is aware, in case you missed it in the last chapter or forgot, this chapter contains smut._

It had been, possibly, the longest day of Doumeki's life, and not just in the number of hours sense. His mother had in fact seen the two of them kissing behind the tree, and in her usual mother sense, she had not liked it. Doumeki could tell because she spent the rest of the evening trying to keep them from leaving. Her thought was that if Watanuki and Doumeki never left her sight, then they would never kiss again. This was really sort of all right for Watanuki, who didn't have to get up the next morning at six to go to school and didn't have homework to finish before going to bed.

At ten o'clock that night, Doumeki finally put his foot down. "We have to go home." Almost before the words left his mouth, Doumeki knew they were the wrong thing to say, but at that point he couldn't stop them.

His mother literary gaped at him, like one of those big mouth bass things that hung on the wall, her lower lip just pumping up and down. And Watanuki was staring too. Saying he was important was one thing, a one thing his mother could handle and that Watanuki understood. But it was completely different for Doumeki to call the Shop home.

But the words were out, and they couldn't be taken back, no matter how much anyone in the room might wish it. Doumeki stood up and walked over to the door. Watanuki awkwardly followed him, making a point to thank Doumeki's mother profusely for dinner. His politeness only made her angrier.

The cool air felt good outside.

"Well," Watanuki started to say, but he had nothing to follow that thought. It wasn't as if dinner had been particularly good or bad, but rather an alarming combination of both extremes.

"Sorry." Doumeki paused in the middle of the sidewalk. "She can be kind of intense sometimes."

Watanuki didn't say anything to that, just looked at his feet and shoved his hands in his pockets. "It's not like I don't have any experience with intense." He sighed loudly. "Do you have a lot of homework to do for tomorrow?"

"Yes." Doumeki knew it was meant to be an innocent question, a way for Watanuki to keep the silence at bay, but he didn't like thinking about tomorrow.

"Oh." Watanuki stretched his hands up. He wanted to say something about how nice it was not to worry about school, or perhaps about how he missed having lunch with Doumeki and Himawari. But he didn't because he didn't want to rub it in Doumeki's face that he didn't have any work to do and he didn't want Doumeki to suggest that he re-enroll. "I've planned a good bento for you for tomorrow."

Doumeki grunted. Truth be told, all he wanted was to go back to bed, not to make small talk which he wasn't very good at to begin with.

After that Watanuki shut up. He could see the droop to Doumeki's shoulders, and the careless way that Doumeki held himself. It was a true sign that Doumeki was exhausted, that he didn't hold his head high and keep his shoulders square. Back at the shop, Doumeki turned to Watanuki as if waiting for something, but Watanuki wasn't sure what. He didn't know what to do with this side of Doumeki. He remembered that he had wanted to kiss Doumeki again, that he had said he would at the shop. So Watanuki inclined his head slightly and brushed his lips against Doumeki's. They tingled when he pulled back. "Good night, Doumeki."

"Good night, Watanuki."

It was two days later, and Watanuki was sitting in the Shop in the middle of the afternoon. He didn't have much to do, no major cleaning and dinner didn't need to be started for another couple of hours. Plus, Doumeki wouldn't be by until much later, he was supposed to eat at the Shrine again. He had muttered something about appeasing his parents that morning.

Watanuki fiddles with the tea cup in front of him, thinking about that morning. He had gotten up to see Doumeki off and give him the bento. Doumeki still looked tired and oddly stressed out. There were strange lines under his eyes.

"Mokona, do you think there is something wrong with Doumeki?" He asked suddenly.

"He looks tired." Mokona said sadly.

"He doesn't sleep through the night." Watanuki leaned back in his chair and stared at the ceiling. "I think he might be stressed."

"Hm," Mokona agreed.

"It's Sunday tomorrow, maybe I will give him a backrub tonight when he comes back from dinner."

"A hot bath is relaxing!" Mokona suggested.

"That's a good idea." Watanuki smiled, glad to have a plan.

It wasn't terribly late when Doumeki came in that night. He had flat out refused his mother's fourth desert and told her he needed to check on Watanuki. It was true, but Doumeki just wanted to get away from her endless chatter. Not that Watanuki didn't chatter, but that was different. That was Watanuki.

"I'm home." He called out when he came through the front door of the shop.

"In here." Watanuki called from down the hall.

Doumeki walked over because really he didn't have anything better to do. It was too early to go to bed, and he didn't want to worry about homework just yet. The smell of cloves was coming from the bathroom where Doumeki heard Watanuki's voice coming from. "What are you doing?" He asked and stepped into the doorway.

There were candles set up around Yuuko's bathtub. She had some claw-foot monstrosity put in the house not long after Watanuki had started working for her. It dominated the rather small bathroom. Good thing there wasn't anything else really in there.

Except for the candles.

"I thought you might like a hot bath. It might help you relax." Watanuki's face was bright red.

"Thanks." Doumeki said and then moved out of the doorway.

Watanuki quickly scooted out of the room, exceptionally embarrassed. He had been setting up the bath, thinking about how great it would be for Doumeki, and how nice it would be to do something for him for a change. And then he had been thinking about the bath and how nice the water would feel on Doumeki's skin, how it might sooth his aches and pains. Then he imagined giving him a backrub, because that was always nice for getting rid of pain and for making a person feel more comfortable.

Which led Watanuki to think about Doumeki's muscles, and how he would be able to feel them stiff and hard underneath his hands. And as he kneaded those muscles that would get tender, and how as it started to feel nice Doumeki's head might hang limp a little and bob back and forth in time with Watanuki's movements. And then there was also the idea of stiff and hard, and other things that might be stiff and hard.

It had been a rather intimate set of thoughts, and Watanuki was slightly embarrassed by them, so he moved quickly to get out of Doumeki's way. But he didn't move far.

Doumeki shut the door and undressed quickly, without taking the time to really consider the pile of clothes he was leaving on the floor. In fact, he wasn't really thinking about anything except getting into the tub full of nice hot water. He got awkwardly into the large tub, spilling some of the water onto the floor, and immediately dunked his head under the water for as long as he could hold his breath.

Watanuki heard the water hit the floor and his mouth went dry. There could be no doubt that Doumeki was naked in that tub, that hot water touching all of those naked parts. Naked parts that Watanuki was unusually curious about. What would his skin feel like if he ran his fingers across it? Rough with calluses or smooth? What did it look like, heated from the water? Bright red or more of a pink color? Would his face be flushed?

He knocked on the door hesitantly.

"Yes?" Doumeki called out.

"Would you—would you like me to scrub your back?" Watanuki shouted. He was nervous.

Doumeki wasn't sure what to say to that. Did he want someone to come in and interrupt his alone time, even if that someone was Watanuki? It would be nice for someone to scrub his back, but would it be all chatter and awkwardness? "Yes."

Watanuki walked in slowly, still shy and unsure. He knelt down behind Doumeki and put his hands on the back of his shoulders. They were smooth and firm from all the archery. His skin was very warm from the heat and just a little flushed. He rubbed his hands back and forth lightly, just feeling the skin.

"Mhmm," Doumeki leaned forward just a little, and Watanuki leaned with him.

But that put him on the edge of his knees, the painful way to kneel. "I'll be right back." Watanuki said.

Doumeki heard him put a foot stool on the floor behind him. It meant that Watanuki was sitting up quite a bit higher than before, but at least this way he wouldn't be hurting his knees. He rubbed his hands back and forth across the tops of Doumeki's shoulders and down his arms a little. He rubbed the upper part of his back and felt all the muscles relax underneath his fingers.

"You've been really stressed, haven't you?"

"Hm." Doumeki grunted in reply and leaned his head back against the side of the tub. Watanuki could see pretty much everything, and his mouth went dry again.

He ran his hands from Doumeki's shoulders down to his hands and back up again. But he wondered if Doumeki's chest felt as nice as his arms. Were his chest muscles as developed? Would they also relax underneath his hands?

Slowly, nervously, Watanuki reached forward and spread his hands over Doumeki's chest. These muscles felt different. It wasn't that they weren't as smooth or as strong, but they had more definition. There were indentations, dips and rises to these muscles much more so then the back ones. He moved his hands up and down and back and forth, from his collar bone to the bottom of his rib cage and from side to side.

Suddenly he was reminded of a time when something like this had happened before, except Doumeki had been the one touching Watanuki. He stopped moving his hands, and Doumeki opened his eyes. "You don't have to continue, if you don't want to." He said, no idea what was going through Watanuki's mind.

Watanuki on the other hand, thought that Doumeki understood exactly what he was thinking. "No, I do want to." He ran his hands back and forth a few more times, and then ran just his fingers of Doumeki's nipples.

Doumeki's eyes went wide as he realized what was going on, and he went very, very still. The nipple underneath Watanuki's fingers started to get a little hard, and since Watanuki had liked it so much when Doumeki had touched them, he did the same. He rolled one between two fingers and then drew little circles around it He smoothed his hand up and down over it until it was very hard. And then he did the same to the other side.

By this time both of them were breathing hard and Watanuki was breathing right in Doumeki's ear. He reached his hands down and skimmed them over Doumeki's stomach. It quivered underneath his touch.

Suddenly Doumeki reached out and grabbed Watanuki's hand, his fingers clamped around his wrist like a shackle. "Stop."

Watanuki drew his shaky hand back and clasped them together tightly in his lap. He was confused and ashamed. "Why?"

"Why?" Doumeki turned his head around to see Watanuki.

"Doesn't it feel good?" He asked quietly, the words directed at his lap.

"Of course it feels good." Doumeki couldn't believe that Watanuki had even had to ask.

"Then why do I have to stop?"

"Because—" But Doumeki didn't have a reason, not even a bullshit reason. He turned his head as far as it would go, but Watanuki was directly behind him and sitting back too far. He stayed that way for a long moment, his hand still clasped around Watanuki's wrist. "You don't have to."

When he let go, Watanuki drew his hand back.

"Are you okay?" Doumeki asked when Watanuki didn't say anything or move.

"Yes. No." He hunched up into himself, nervous now that Doumeki had stopped him.

Abruptly Doumeki got out of the tub, water streaming all over the floor. He grabbed Watanuki's chin and kissed him firmly. It wasn't something he could do while still sitting in the tub. And his lips were soft, malleable, and oh so wonderful to kiss. Just as suddenly, Watanuki pushed him away.

"Oh no, you don't get to do that. You don't get to come over here and kiss me like everything's okay. Because everything is definitely not okay. And I do not appreciate you trying to steal my innocence."

"Because you weren't trying to steal mine earlier." Doumeki retorted.

"You're not innocent!" Watanuki snapped back.

"I know." Doumeki muttered. He climbed back into the tub, as if not facing Watanuki would make this confession easier. "I'm afraid."

"Of what? Of me?" Watanuki asked softly.

"I've never felt like this before." He didn't explain, and while Watanuki would have liked it, he didn't need it. He understood about feeling something new, and he understood about being afraid of those new things. He didn't need to know that while Doumeki had experience, had dated other people, he had never felt the overwhelming urge to protect someone, never had his happiness hinge so completely on someone else, and the thing that throw him over the edge this time, the feeling of needing someone else like he needed air.

"It's new for me, too." Watanuki shrugged, back to being shy and uncertain.

"If that's true, then maybe it's okay."

"What's okay?"

Doumeki smiled. "If it's new for both of us, then it's okay."

"Oh." Watanuki looked at Doumeki's broad back, and he remembered how it felt to run his fingers across that skin. And he remembered the sight of Doumeki standing up with the water streaming down. Very tentatively he reached down and ran one finger over Doumeki's nipple. Doumeki sighed happily, so Watanuki dipped his fingers lower. He ran them back and forth across Doumeki's stomach, teasing him, but not on purpose. His hand brushed a little lower, a little lighter every time, and it trembled.

Doumeki reached down and settled his hand over Watanuki's. "Are you sure?" Watanuki leaned his head down on Doumeki's back, and Doumeki smiled a little. "Do you want me to show you?"

He nodded his head slowly. "Please."

Doumeki got out of the water knelt down on the floor in front of Watanuki so they were face to face. He ran his hands up and down the sides of Watanuki's legs and then unbuttoned them. He looked at Watanuki's face to make sure that Watanuki was still okay. And then he put his hands back on Watanuki's hip. "You'll have to stand up."

He jerked up and the stool feel over. Doumeki pulled down Watanuki's pants.

Gently he touched Watanuki, glancing up every once in a while. Watanuki had only a few hazy memories of the last time this had happened, enough to know that it had, but not enough to understand how it really worked. He watched Doumeki's hands closely.

They were stroking him, with a steady, light touch, and it felt good. And then Watanuki felt Doumeki's lips on him, a soft pressure on the tip. A tongue reached out and gently caressed him. It felt odd, and then it felt oddly good. It stroked up and down, back and forth, from tip to base, and all around. Watanuki thought he might lose it.

Doumeki leaned back. "Do you understand?"

It wasn't that Watanuki was completely clueless; the boy did know how to read. But there was a very large difference between theoretical knowledge and firsthand experience. Having Doumeki show him fell right between the two.

When Watanuki knelt down, he put his hands on Doumeki's hips nervously, and then took several deep breaths. He reached out and stroked Doumeki a few times, and then kissed it like Doumeki had kissed his. He took the tip into his mouth, and actual words came out of Doumeki's. Watanuki wasn't paying much attention to that though; he was trying to figure out if he could put all of Doumeki inside his mouth. It seemed pretty unlikely.

But, if Watanuki wrapped his hand around the base, the he could sheath all of Doumeki. That was really rather uncomfortable though, so Watanuki decided to stick with what he knew, licking, sucking, and stroking. At this point Doumeki began muttering incoherently to himself over and over. He was actually quite loud for someone who was muttering. When Watanuki accidentally dragged his teeth along Doumeki, Doumeki grabbed Watanuki's head and began thrusting into his mouth.

It was awkward and uncomfortable, and finally Watanuki had to say something, even if his mouth was full. He meant to say, "Stop doing that, it hurts." But he only got as far as "Stop doing—" before Doumeki came. He had already been very close to the edge, so feeling the vibrations sent him over the edge.

He stood for a moment with his hands buried in Watanuki's hair while Watanuki spat and wiped his mouth off on his shirt. "Is it always this messy?" Heasked.

Doumeki laughed a little. He always felt like laughing just afterwards. "When we do it right, there's more."

Watanuki was silent for a moment. "I don't know how I feel about that."

"If we ever get it right, you'll like it."

Watanuki looked at the mess on the floor and on his shirt. "Well, you'll have to clean it up. I've already cleaned this bathroom once today."

Doumeki laughed harder.


End file.
